In past relationships I always felt very under appreciated. It felt like I was always keeping the ball rolling but all of my efforts went unnoticed.
I understand in a way. You get comfortable in your roles and you forget that there the person you love most isn’t obligated to do the things they do. They do them because they love and care about you.
We, as humans, all need to be appreciated
We all need the validation that what we do matters. When we don’t get that, we tend to feel like giving up.
In other words, don’t take people for granted. Do you know how soul sucking it can be to have your efforts be ignored by people? This happens a lot in relationships and it’s why a lot of them fail.
I remember when I was still with the father of my children. There were many problems in our relationship but one that had a big impact was his lack of appreciation he showed towards me. It was if he felt entitled to me and what I did for him.
I made dinner every night and never once heard him say thank you for it. Heck, most of the time he refused it because he didn’t like the way I made it.
It was little things like this that made me feel unappreciated by him.
It made me feel like the best I had to give him wasn’t good enough. Not for him and not for anyone. My efforts being ignored made me feel worthless.
He just assumed I would always be there for him time and time again to clean up the messes he was making in his life. I did do that for a long time but I had finally had enough when he started to take advantage of it. He was genuinely shocked when I broke up with him.
Some words of encouragement or appreciation would have gone a long way in that relationship. His lack of these things was not the reason I cut it off with him but they did put a few nails in that coffin.